ad familiares

dear family: give me a wii. yr relative, chris.

ad linguam programmatorum

dear python: please give me the item. yr friend, chris.

ad laborem a capite

dear headache: please go away. thank you. yr victim, chris.

pro alio ad feriam

dear sundance: fyi an update i now have a RAZR so i am cool enough for your film shindig. yr friend, andy.

ad prophetam

dear jeremiah: ok, enough already! yr reader, chris.

ad professorem

dear professor: i cannot read the bible on election day. it simply does not work like that. yr student, chris.

ad bibliam

dear bible: re jonathan and david: did they or didn't they? put up or shut up. less talk more cock. yr reader, chris.

pro alio ad fututum

dear sir: thank you for the night you inserted your handsome penis into my rectum. it was completely sublime. sorry i didn't catch your name, yours, etc., kevin.

p.s. were you the one with the herpes? just curious.